Annyeong! I'm Jeng Cute, a.k.a. imnsho (for this blog anyways) I still use another web handle but that's for you to figure out.
I am tired.happy.blessed.
Posted by jeng_is_cute at 02:21 PM on July 5, 2008.
Thank God for weekends!
Always hard to think where to begin!? Sooo much has happen to my life these past few days! I have stories to share that dates back in weeks ago. I barely have time to rest anymore. I am physically tired but mentally stimulated with my work and spiritually growing with my SFC family. And now I have to be in a stand still. Time to give my physical body to recuperate.
Mentally, I am challenged.
Oh, I know you are thinking that I should have been admitted in a loony bin yeas ago, but this one is a different challenge. As they say, careful what you wish for and prepare yourself. A few months ago I was praying for work, work that I can excel in... I really don't know how you can prepare for something like my work. Yes my friends, I am not working in Manila anymore, I am working in Singapore, and work is really work. At least I get to be paid my worth (i think), and they want to get every cent of it, which in return I intend of doing. Well, I'm not saying it as a bad thing, I am saying that it is really challenging for me. Meeting my boss's expectations, meeting the client's expectations, meeting my own expectations. And of course everything doesn't come without extra challenges, difficult people, difficult bugs, difficult work hours (darn 8am! hahaha) but who's complaining???
You know 4 years ago when I started working, I thanked God that there was a little company then called SPL Worldgroup who accepted me as Trainee. My grades were far from the grades of those who graduated with honors but I was still given a really good opportunity to show what I can do. We were the Lucky 9. 9th and last batch of Natural trainees (not re-tooled). 9 of us started training in Natural - others went on to be traineed in peoplesoft. And after all the training woes have been said and done, 4 of us finished the training plus 5 more from the peoplesoft batch, which makes us 9. Nine meanies.
Enough work flash backs for now, I am just thankful that I am able to continue on woking with what I have learned from way back. Like I said before, I have learned from the best teachers in this business. They have thought me well. Its now up to me to make things work out the way I want it to be. Every difficulty in my life is only for now.
Spiritually, I am renewed.
If there is something really positive I got out of being a bum for more than 3 months, is that I have found my faith again. What is there to lose to have some little faith? That there is a loving God out there who guides me with every decision I make. And sure beats out the effort in disproving that there is none. You can call god whatever you want, you can know him as Allah or some form of god, but I call mine Jesus Christ. I am happy to be baptised and born as a Roman Catholic. If I was born into a different faith also, I think I would be happy in it, stive my best to be the best believer I can be. But here I am a Christian and happy and proud to be one.
As a Roman Catholic I think going to church is really not enough. Don't you feel sometimes the priest doesn't make much sense to you? Well my simple explanation to it is that God's message for that homily is not for you, its for somebody else to hear. Try going again next week, hopefully its for you already. So simple lesson is not to miss going to mass or you might miss God's message for you. But going back, going to church is not enough, that is why there are groups out there who invites you to help you out in knowing Christ more in a very personal level.
And I have joined the CFC family ministry again. SFC Singapore. I guess its about time that I sow in my roots again, and find the deeper service I have looking for all along. I don't really know what lies ahead of me but I think I am happy now that I am able to incorporate in my life the service I was missing during those times that I always had an excuse for when called to service. I have great bros and sis here, and my parents are really happy that I am again introduced to this family.
Physically, I am burned.
This is something I have to work on. I am truthfully happy and feel blessed but my body is taking its toll. I am tried. I know God gives me strength but of course my body could only take in so much. I am tired. But I want to enjoy every moment of my life right now. I am tired. But would you believe that I get to go home commuting and walking at 12 midnight? Me who can't even go on gimiks in Manila without having someone to drop me home or stay overnight with. Me who can't even take a cab to go home now rides taxis alone. I only wish that my friends back in Manila are here with me to enjoy life with me. When I reminisc about my life back in Manila, I have so many missed oppurtunities to spend time with them... but those who are already here, now I can't have enough time for them! Crazy! God has a crazy way of scheming things.
tired.happy.blessed. hopefully soon, I could change it to revived.happy.blessed. better if I could sum it in one word - Contentment.
